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Christmas is only four days away and I haven't felt this un inspired in...well, I don't know when. I am usually a huge proponent of dragging out the Christmas decor and holiday songs immediately after Thanksgiving day. This year, either be/c I live in the tiniest apartment or because I feel more involved in my work, Christmas has taken a backseat to just, life. Perhaps my mentality before was more damaging. I am not sure but I feel sad...I feel as though I have lost yet another aspect of my "youth." Case in point: I met Erick for dinner on Monday night. We met in Wicker Park and let me tell you, I have never felt more old or out of place. Trendsters abound and the intersection of Damen, Milwaukee, and North becomes a bermuda triangle of sorts, for those of us who may belong more to the main stream then the cult scenes of music, art, literature - independent, of course. I felt old, did I already say that? I am only 24. Not a child for certain and definitely into the "should know better" sect, but maybe it was coming from work at a law firm, a place I am deeply committed, what with my eventual entrance as a member of the bar (someday...soon, I hope, although I still haven't heard back from any of my schools - no news is good news though).

Anyway, I digress. I know essentially nothing about new music, other than what my friend Will burns onto some sort of comp. Erick referenced it as a burn out of sort, but its not that. I don't know what it is. My mind exhausts me, really. No closure on that thought - thread I guess.

Tonight is my friend Jliz's birthday - hello 26. I am taking her out to dinner at Grand Lux to celebrate. I hope she enjoys it.

Eduardo is safely in Panama, basking in the sun and the beach. He said the waves were zilch so no surfing for him. He sounds like he's enjoying himself and he deserves it - he had a great semester. I am so happy for him. I miss him terribly of course, and last night when we talked he said he is "thinking of me always, missing me very much." Mutual feeling, really.

In passing my evenings, I have been watching Entourage from the beginning. I love that show so much. Especially Ari. Between him and Patrick Fitzgerald, its a draw. I love them both...but never as much as I love Eduardo. *

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