The "Declaration of Faith" Entry
Okay so, I suppose I should discuss a couple of the earlier entries that I wrote.
Basically the job here is sorta sucking because of the fact that it is completely different than what I rather signed up for two months prior.
So the deal is this: I am smart (yes) I am young (right) and I am not black(clearly).
Because of these three things, I have been Pro-De moted to the positions (you decide) of
Assistant to the Executive directors
Hiring coordinator and co-internship director.
Basically what that means is that I sit in front of a computer and do all of the "literate" work for the people that get to go out in the field, knock on doors, and talk to voters about why its important to get involved in the political process.
I was actually told carte blanche that the reason why I cannot do that is because I am asian.
Apparently here in Michigan, black voters will only talk to black organizers, and if you're not black--white, asian, latin, whatever--you're screwed.
And because one of the only things that the rest of my "team" has is that they are black enables them to take my work and use it. They apparently don' t have the IT skills or the communication skills to do the tasks I am given--or they would take double the time to finish it...so I get to do it so it actually gets done. But then they use it.
I was so hurt when I heard about this yesterday.
But then I sucked it up and grew up.
I was at Walgreens, buying insane amounts of gatorade when I began observing the clerk.
He was arab, I think, with a thick accent. Cute in that could be a cartoon bug type of way...
He had his standard uniform on, but he was older...and very robotic.
He automatically greeted each customer with a "hello, how are you today?"
And began ringing the sales.
And asked of each of us "would you be interested in our item of the day?"
I can't remember what it was but there was a bright yellow poster, which was clearly printed off of MSoft Word using that damn Times New Roman font, size 33, saying "Free $5 if we don't ask if you'd be interested in our item of the day!" taped crookedly on the front of the counter.
I was actually surprised that nothing was spelt incorrectly.
And it just hit me that I cannot even begin to complain. I think every day of the jobs people have, don't have, have to take...and I think about (and I know this is lame) all of the little dreams and hopes that we all have growing up--and just watching how the world can disassemble them year after year--this man didn't say when he was 8 "I want to be a clerk at the walgreens on 10 and 12 mile! And promote a stupid item every day that i have no say over!"
And as much as I didn't say "I want my race to be used against me so that I get a cushy office job while my black co-horts walk door after door in the projects trying to get people involved in politics" (which actually sounds better to me in some ways), who does?
I guess it was sort of that
House of Sand and Fog syndrome hitting me. I can't believe what a brat I can be sometimes. Nothing is fair...and at least I am not reduced to working in a Walgreens.
:::
So the job is sorta sucky and very political in its structure. I have to surrender the self righteousness "I am better than this" and just go with it.
I am making invaluable contacts.
I get paid to live here.
I get paid to eat here.
I get paid to sit in an office with a computer and do my work at my own pace.
And I get the ability to hire people/staff interns/ and have a say in all of the "big" projects and issues that the director's deal with...plus, they're all DC heads who can write me letters of rec. which will be invaluable to me--law school recommendations anyone?
So I have decided I have to grow up and take this as a job...a job that has it's downsides, a job that frustrated me, and a job that wasn't what I thought it was when I went in. The fact that so much is based around my race does infuriate me but to some degree, I am getting the best I can get with that--I could just be one of the secretaries that orders office supplies and completes bills.
But it is a double edged sword...just what I asked for, for my birthday.
Eddie, are you listening?;) haha.
